Visions Journal

A guide for families, peers and educators

Mahboubeh Asgari, PHD

Reprinted from the The Vibes Are Off: Young People, Anxiety and Depression issue of Visions Journal, 2025, 21 (1), pp. 28-30

Think about a time when you felt anxious or overwhelmed. Maybe you needed to talk to someone—someone who didn’t try to fix everything right away, but made you feel safe to share your thoughts, fears or uncertainties. What made that space feel safe? Was it the kindness of the other person? The way they listened and let you express yourself freely? Or a combination of all these and other things? 

Now, think about the role you play in a young person’s life. Whether you are a parent, teacher or friend, you have the power to create that safe space for them. Young people need to feel heard and supported when dealing with mental health challenges. Here are some ideas on how to create open and welcoming spaces where youth may feel more comfortable sharing their thoughts and emotions.

The importance of safe spaces

Anxiety and depression are among the most common mental health challenges faced by youth. Many young people want support that’s understanding, validating and empowering. But without open conversations and safe spaces, these complex conditions can become overwhelming. Youth may feel alone and afraid to speak up. Safe spaces can help young people feel valued and heard, reducing feelings of fear or shame.

Dialogue: The foundation of understanding 

Dialogue is a two-way conversation where both sides seek to understand and relate to each other.^1,2 While talking is part of the conversation, listening and asking good questions are even more important. The goal isn't to find the "right" answers or reach agreement. It’s not about proving a point or convincing someone they’re wrong. 

Instead, dialogue is about understanding someone else's perspective and accepting each other. Engaging in dialogue about mental health can be difficult, and discomfort is often a part of it. However, the goal of dialogue is not to avoid discomfort. It’s about creating an environment where young people feel safe enough to share their experiences. Below are some steps towards a safe and open space.

1. Create a supportive container

Dialogue happens in a physical or virtual space where people come together. It’s also about a set of non-physical conditions where everyone feels safe, respected and recognized for who one is. This whole space can be called the container for dialogue.³ The container includes:

• Physical space: A welcoming and comfortable setting reduces anxiety and encourages dialogue. Sitting in a circle or ensuring everyone is at the same eye level fosters a sense of equality and mutual respect
• Sacred space: Conversations should be built on trust, understanding and shared meaning. Rather than reacting to each other or judging, holding and connecting to each other through thinking is key. In dialogue, people focus on listening and respecting each other’s experiences without trying to fix them

2. Listen attentively

Listening is one of the most powerful ways to support young people. It’s natural to want to give advice or try to make things better right away, but real dialogue happens when young people feel heard.

• Let the youth do most of the talking
• Try not to label emotions as “bad” 
• Offer guidance without rushing to give instructions or commands

3. Suspend assumptions

We all have personal assumptions about mental health, but these can prevent real understanding. It’s important to pause, put our assumptions on hold and take time to reflect on them.

• Avoid phrases like “It’s just a phase” or “You’ll get over it”
• Ask questions to understand their feelings instead of making assumptions
• Keep an open mind and be willing to learn

4. Be empathetic

Empathy is at the core of human relationships. It is the attempt to imagine ourselves in someone else's shoes and to try to see and feel the world from their perspective. 

• Take time to listen and understand their emotions rather than being too quick to say, “I know how you feel”
• Share your own emotions to show it’s OK to talk about feelings
• Encourage creative outlets like journaling, drawing or music to help express emotions

5. Be open and curious

In dialogue, everyone is open to new ideas and truly curious about how others see the world. Curiosity creates deeper conversations through thoughtful questions. 

• Use open-ended questions like “How do you feel about…?” instead of “Don’t you think…?”
• Show genuine curiosity and use questions like “What if?” or “What could be?” to encourage them to imagine new ways of thinking
• Accept that you don’t have to have the answers

6. Build connection, even in silence

Sometimes, young people may shut down or avoid talking. This withdrawal is often a defence mechanism, as youth may fear that expressing their feelings will lead to judgment or misunderstanding. It’s important for adults to remain patient and available without pushing young people too hard.

• Spend time together doing activities like watching a movie or taking a walk
• Send a simple message like, “I’m here for you whenever you’re ready to talk”
• Be patient—sometimes, just being present is enough to offer comfort

Closing thoughts

In a world filled with digital conversations, taking the time for real, face-to-face discussions can help youth feel seen and supported. Your willingness to listen can be the key to helping them navigate their emotions and challenges.